Military confused by things in general
President Barack Obama has announced the withdrawal of most US troops in Iraq by the end of August 2010. In a speech at a Marine Corps base, he said the US “combat mission” in Iraq would officially end by that time.
The President has already taken calls from senior generals eager to know where the troops will get to go next. Bids have already been made for Saudi Arabia, Russia, Iran and Mexico. However the military officials are said to have been stunned to be told that the US might not actually invade anyone and if they do then it won’t necessarily be an oil-producing country.
The news has left armed forces leaders perplexed although most assume it is a complex bluff to lull other countries into a false sense of security. Some are already drawing up a plan for regime change in Mexico which produces 4.8% of the world’s oil but continues to have a horrendous human rights record on guacamole. Canada (3.9% of the world’s oil) faces a United Nations resolution demanding that they stop providing a home for beavers, moose and terrorist geese.
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