The grieving family of reality TV star Jade Goody are said to be upset by the news that her husband Jack Tweedy is to cash in on her death by writing a book about their time together. They say that they have suffered enough heartache without more dirty linen being aired in public.

The announcement of the book deal came as news filtered through that, despite being in heaven for only four days, Jade is already up for eviction. TV spiritualist Derek Akora who communicated with deceased medium Doris Stokes who spoke to Jade, said that she was “gutted” at being put up for eviction so soon. Ms Goody will face a heavenly public vote alongside former German chancellor Otto von Bismarck, jazz singer Billie Holiday and Kirkpatrick Macmillan the inventor of the bicycle.

It is the third successive week that Macmillan has been up for eviction after continually annoying heaven-mates by cycling on the pavements past the Pearly Gates while singing Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head. Macmillan was hot favourite to be evicted last week but was saved when unusual betting patterns on the outcome were detected and the eviction was called off. The prophet Nostradamus has been suspended pending an investigation.

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