The French delegation is threatening to walk out of this week’s G20 summit in London if their demands for better catering are not met. Their culinary demands are also likely to further threaten several species of the already endangered Scottish haggis.

President Sarkozy has described the standards of catering at his hotel as “dégoûtant” as local chefs are using the summit as a way of promoting the best in British food and drink.  Sadly, Welsh rarebit, Yorkshire puddings, Cumberland sausage and Toad in the Hole have met with Gallic shrugs of disapproval and, as the French clearly enjoy rare and exotic meats, only haggis has met with the approval of the French government. Consequently, the hunting season for haggis has been extended until after the summit, due to start on Wednesday, to satisfy the voracious appetites of officials from Paris.

Haggis farmers all over the north of Scotland have seen their flocks decimated as government officials have turned up unannounced and taken the best livestock for the table in London. It can take as many as eight beasts to provide one French-sized portion, and the farmed variety are generally smaller than their wild cousins, forcing an extension to the hunting season.

Concerns that the summit has failed to promote Anglo-French harmony were raised as soon as breakfast was served, “Il sont des barbares”, Sarkozy commented, “ils mangent du boudin pour le petit-déjeuner”.

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