Beckham became a cult hero among the Galaxy faithful by making Tuesday night’s “open house” for anyone who wanted to pop around and play his favourite board game.

When Mr Brown flew to Washington last week, President Obama, who hadn’t realised he was coming, gave him a gift of a box set of DVDS which his wife’s sister had given him for Christmas.

Talks are already underway to sign up celebrity endorsement of the new-look doll and both Hillary Clinton and Michelle Obama have been approached.

Unfortunately Gary Barlow’s agent misread the invitation and Barlow actually walked up Kilimanjaro.

Madeley says he is keen to show the viewing public that he isn’t simply a smug, one-dimensional simpleton with the emotional reach of a tin of hairspray.

Cole has admitted that he called the officers disputatious polemicists when they continued to argue with him and that he went on to call them neo-reactionary Neanderthals.

Protestors such as Ms Deen are being trained by a mysterious group known as Sweet Revenge which is reportedly part of al-Qaeda’s non-military wing.

Ms Bruni said that she and the president had drawn up a short list of possible candidates for adoption but had not yet decided if they wanted a boy or a girl.

The Chancellor said that they would print off £5000 for every adult in the country and £1000 for every child.

However Mr Brown replied, “I’m not trying to cause a big sensation. I’m just talking about my generation.”