The McConnell Log
Some smart Alex once said that Scotland will only be free when the last minister of the Kirk is strangled with the last copy of The Sunday Post. Now, thanks to Jack Topaz McConnell, that has all changed. Now they say that Scotland will only be free when the First Minister is strangled. Wee Jack, however, is much more than mere politician. Unknown to many of his countrymen, he is also poet and tragedian. For better and for verse. Much, much verse. Here, in a style owing much to lauded predecessors such as Burns, McGonagall and Dalglish, is the secret poetry of Jack Topaz McConnell.
Wednesday, June 23, 2004
Farewell to Whatsisname
Alas poor John Thingy
He’s here nae mair
He’s clean disappeared
Like the last o’ his hair
Alas poor John Thingy
He’s been fund oot
They cried him a loser
An gied him the boot
Alas poor John Thingy
He was nae brain surgeon
He thocht Alex Salmond
Was yon Nicola Sturgeon
Alas poor John Thingy
I liked him just fine
I was fair scunnered when
They made him resign
Alas poor John Thingy
We’ll see him nae mair
They’ve called for Roseanna
A lesbian? That’s rerr
He’s here nae mair
He’s clean disappeared
Like the last o’ his hair
Alas poor John Thingy
He’s been fund oot
They cried him a loser
An gied him the boot
Alas poor John Thingy
He was nae brain surgeon
He thocht Alex Salmond
Was yon Nicola Sturgeon
Alas poor John Thingy
I liked him just fine
I was fair scunnered when
They made him resign
Alas poor John Thingy
We’ll see him nae mair
They’ve called for Roseanna
A lesbian? That’s rerr
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